Old year, new year

Ok, kids, time for the pseudo-philosophical post looking back to the year that ends and looking forward to the one that will soon begin... And since not long ago I was accused of writing like an engineer, I may do it in bullet points. Or maybe not, but close.

This year sucked. Big huge time. Well, mostly the first ¾ of it. But I turned 40 during the last quarter, so I might as well round it up to the entire year.

Rest in peace, Jose Tomas

During the first half, my nephew and three other people very close to me and my family passed away; one of them, I considered my sister. My nephew was born premature, and was alive for mere three months... During those three months he received 11 surgeries and coded 5 times. His death was extremely painful, but his life was too, so, along with the pain, his death also brought relief to everyone. I can’t imagine enduring as much pain as he did while he was alive. How can someone believe in a god of love, forgiveness and compassion that would also allow for this to happen?

He arrived too early and left us too soon…. As my mom said, he was too beautiful for this life.

Rest in peace, Jose Tomas.

Also during this first half, my mom was diagnosed with an illness, from which she probably will not recover.


Then, I was laid off; which led to a 1.5 months of a hell of uncertainty and self-doubt of my professional worth: It was the second time in two years, hard not to wonder if *I* was the problem.

 In September, I started a new job... Now, all is good job-wise.

Also in September, I had the close encounter with the scale, and the de-blobbing process began.

In October, I broke-up with the vegan. But that was a good thing; I was so tired of making up excuses for him all the time.

Also in October, I said goodbye to someone I loved dearly... It was hard, yet necessary out of self-respect: having him in my life was unhealthy; I needed peace.

November was full of friends, laughs, dinners, friends-givings and happy moments. I re-discovered what amazing friends I have, how much they love me, and how much I love them. It was cathartic; I needed that.

December... a moment of truth: I turned 40, which brought a lot of mixed emotions... But faced with the choice of hiding under the bed or celebrating, I chose to party. I got way too much wine and cheese and invited friends over; and, taking advantage of the 12 pounds I had lost by then, I wore a bright, tight, short, sexy red dress that probably made my grandmother jump and twist in her grave.

Now, I leave for Chile this coming week. It is going to be summer, family, friends, cycling, and dogs for two weeks… and my brother will pilot the plane taking me south. I am so excited.

Next year is looking promising: I am still hoping to find my legs' power, wherever it may be, and be somewhat competitive on my bike… I am looking at the mirror and liking what I see: 14 pounds down so far, and a pound from the weight I had before my surgery.

Finally, last but certainly not least, my job will be taking me to Guatemala, Honduras, Uganda, Nepal, Rwanda, Tunisia, and Morocco to do development work: the dream that drove me to get my PhD.

I can’t wait.