Cleaning, ordering, de-cluttering, detox-ing my life

I need to do cleaning. I keep too much clutter... Things and people that I keep around for sentimental and “political” reasons, just-in-case; and that, at the end, weight me down and that I need to let go.

But… it is hard. I have always had issues letting go of everything. Learning to do seems a somewhat painful process that takes you to some unknown land.

I started with Facebook. I seemed the easier first step. And about 50 “friends,” people I barely knew in some past life or those I have not talked to in 20 years were dropped. I need to revisit that list, I think letting go becomes easier once you get started. I also built a “No Wall” list, those who cannot see my wall.

As a side note, it is funny how Facebook relationships become a matter of politics… I realized there are people I’d like to “de-friend”, yet, I can’t. Like those cousins I don’t really know, but they are family. Like that person that I used to consider a friend, until I discovered she was only using me and lying to my face but is still friends with other good friends of mine. All those were thrown into the “No Wall” group.

My house… that is going to be a major project. Sometimes I feel one of these days I’ll end up in an episode of “hoarders”… that is, until I watch part of the show. Eeeck. So many things, and memories that I need to let go of at home...

And finally, this blog. This has been on my mind these last few days, whether to get rid of it or reinvent it. Given how tough this last year has been for me, I turned this blog into an outlet of my emotions, feelings, frustrations and despair. I always trusted my anonymity, since I assumed very few people read it, and most of those who do, do not know me -and those who do, I thought I knew who they were and did not care-. I have realized that is a fallacy and I have been fooling myself… I am not blaming anyone for this, as I laid it all out in a public place for anyone to see and I have never asked anyone not to read it (which, let's face it, wouldn't make any sense anyways). It was my decision, but I am not longer comfortable with it. So, I have been pondering my options… At first, I was tempted to delete the blog or simply stop writing. I ended up realizing that my personal feelings and emotions probably have no place in Internet, and the best is to return this blog into what initially was… talk about bikes, dogs, mundane and silly things, maybe some politics and economics too.