I'm originally from your area and will be moving back here very soon--and will be here a lot in the process. I'm here this week because my Dad died suddenly of a heart attack and I have been helping my Mom make the arrangements, etc.. My youngest sister is here as well and my other three siblings will be arriving by Friday. The funeral is Saturday. It's been very difficult and I logged on here as a distraction this morning, saw your profile, and felt absoltuely compelled to respond. You're very attractive and sound like a smart and nice person. I'd love to get to know you!
This email makes me suspicious in so many ways since,
(1) Were this true, sorry, but a bit too much information
(2) Who in the world, going through all the difficulties of a sudden parent death, actually spends his times attempting to score a date? Maybe my profile is that wonderful, but really?
(3) Related to (1), too many details again... maybe too many to actually be true. Feel sorry for me, console me, anyone?
(4) Out-of-towner, but yet conveniently in town now, moving here and claiming that will be here a lot in the process...
Hmmmm, am I crazy or does this sound a lot like a married jerk trying to find fun on the side?
On top of that, the guy did not really seem to have read my profile, since he is conservative and I am pretty clear that I probably won’t go for those (nothing wrong with being conservative, mind you, I just don't seem to get along with those in many dimensions). Finally, this is from his profile, the cherry on the top:
I'm looking for someone really special with whom to have an incredible relationship of and for a lifetime. And bonus: I like and respect women and am monogamous too!
Bonus? Is that really a bonus?
UPDATE: The best part yet, after I sent the standard "thanks, but no thanks" message, he actually got pissed and responded: "Lazy automatic response. Good luck". Priceless.